This is what one of my favorite yoga teachers and somatic coaches says to me often.
“Can you stay with yourself here?” – Jay Fields.
Notice what you feel – anxiety, sadness, anger, pain, hurt, excitement, joy, pleasure, whatever…Can you stay present and not (mentally) abandon or disassociate from yourself when these feelings come up in your body? Notice, what happens next?
Now, back this up a bit, how do you even know what you’re feeling right now? How do you know if you’re feeling sad? angry? What happens in your body? This isn’t easy, I know. It takes practice, but can you stay with yourself?
Staying (emotionally) and not fleeing, fighting, freezing (in your mind) is what builds presence, intuition, agency, and zones of resilience. Nothing outside of you — behaviors, substances, people — can do this for you. But you can do this for yourself! Sit, ground your feet into the earth beneath you. Notice. Stay with yourself.
For more on this topic: Listen to Episode 17 & 18, Anxiety Part 1, 2 on the “Editing Our Drinking and Our Lives” Podcast with Aidan Donnelley Rowley and Jolene Park.
Also, check out my interview on The Don’t Freak Out Podcast with Allison Micco about Somatic Therapy and The Mind/Body Connection For Anxiety.
Resources For Gray Area Drinkers: